Have you ever started crying while eating some shitty diet food?
It’s like I’m being babysat by Satan and he struggles to feed me another bite.
Satan: come on bitch, this is the last one…whoooo here comes the lettuce!
me: noooo Satan! PLEASE! I’M FULL!
Satan: SHUT UP AND TAKE YOUR SALAD LIKE A REAL WOMAN!
me: *cries while eating*